Life as a Preacher's Wife
"I am not going to marry a preacher" is what I told myself when I started getting old enough to date. I was so sure I did not want to be in the preaching family business again once I was old enough to start my own life...and then I met Jacob. (ha!) It's funny how so often in life you end up "eating your own words" because I sure did!
When I first started talking to Jacob I flat out told him that I wasn't interested in marrying a preacher because I grew up in a preacher's family and I wanted something different. I was tired of moving, changing schools, having to let old friends go and make new ones, I was tried of starting over again. That's pretty much what my life consisted of while growing up. And right when I met Jacob I had just moved to the Roanoke, TX area and so my emotions were running high. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change the past for anything (well, maybe just one or two things, ha!) because it has made me the person that I am today. It prepared me for who I would be, and that is a Preacher's Wife.
Growing up in a preacher's family was definitely challenging, but it was rewarding as well. I lived in 6 different places which were: Quilan, TX, Niagara Falls, NY, Odessa, TX, Cleburne, TX, Purvis/Hattiesburg, MS, and Roanoke, TX. I went to 4 different schools, Odessa Christian School, Cleburne Community Christian School, Lamar Christian School, and Northwest High School, as well as tried to home school 2 different times. Every time we had to leave one of those places I thought the world was going to end, but then I would settle down, make new friends, and then cry all over again when we had to leave that place for the next. I like to think of myself as lucky because some people grow up in one place and never know anything different, and I have gotten to live all over the state (West, Central, and East Texas) as well as in 2 different states! I got to see God's beautiful creation not only in Texas but outside in our country as well. We had the opportunity to become close with different congregations of the Lord's Church and make best friends where ever we went. I now realize I grew as a person from each experience, and as hard as it may have been and as many times I wish we could have just settled down for good, I wouldn't want it any other way.
I never thought I would follow in my mother's footsteps and become a preacher's wife but God's will told me otherwise. And why chose a different path when being in a preacher's family is what I know? There are women out there who don't grow up the way I did and then become a preacher's wife. For me, I experienced it all and I know what to expect. I saw what my mother had to go through, the good and the bad, and that's what scared me a little. I didn't know if I could handle that. I am not a leader, I am shy (at first), I get nervous, I don't like being the center of attention. I don't feel I am ready to teach any Ladies Classes or Ladies Day. I still feel that I need to learn and grow and build up my confidence in myself. So how can I BE a good preacher's wife?
We are so blessed to have Atlanta Church of Christ as our first work because they have been beyond welcoming and understanding for the both of us. The elders hired Jacob without an official "try-out" (they heard him a few times before) and I said, "they are willing to hire you before they even know who your wife is? What if I was some crazy woman?" (Ha!) Jacob said, "they are hiring me as the preacher, not the preacher's wife." And that has kinda stuck with me since and helped ease my nerves. Some places do want a preacher's wife who will take control over things, especially with the ladies, etc. But I am very glad that (so far) this congregation hasn't expected that out of me or pressured me in any way. This way I hope I can take my time to grow and become comfortable enough before taking on bigger tasks. I am definitely one of their younger preacher's wives that they've had, so maybe they want to give me some growing room as well. Overall I have been very pleased with this congregation and their elder-ship, and I've enjoyed the times I have been able to get to know the ladies better. I feel like they see me as just a member of the Lord's church just as they are, which I am! And that has definitely allowed me to be able to come out of my shell more and challenge myself to go up to someone and speak to them first, to say hello. They have done a wonderful job of making us feel "at home" and a part of the family here, and we love every one! I am glad they realize that Jacob is the preacher and not me. ;)
An incident occurred recently that kinda hit home with me. Some ladies at the church were planning a party together. They were getting things together and organizing it themselves, but I realized they kept coming to me and asking my opinion on what I would do. After a bit I said to Jacob, "I don't know why they keep coming to me for everything it's their party..." And he said, "well it's because you are the preacher's wife." Those words have never hit me harder. It made me realize that no matter what age I am, no matter how shy I might be, that I am the preacher's wife. People will look to me as an example in things, want to hear my opinion/advice, watch how I raise my kids, etc. And even though this has been a smooth beginning for me as a preacher's wife, that I still have to live up to that title the best I can. Every preacher's wife is different, but I should be willing to do the things that I can for the church, and work on the things I am not ready to do. I now teach kids bible class, I helped organized 2 parties, I have had people over to our house and cooked (and that has been a big deal for me because I am not a "cook" as some of these women here are ha), and we have hosted care group meetings and devo's at our house. I might not be teaching a ladies class or doing devo's or organizing such things just yet, but I have done the best that I can and I hope every one can see that, but mostly I hope that God is proud of what I have tried to do here in Atlanta as "the preacher's wife".
When I first started talking to Jacob I flat out told him that I wasn't interested in marrying a preacher because I grew up in a preacher's family and I wanted something different. I was tired of moving, changing schools, having to let old friends go and make new ones, I was tried of starting over again. That's pretty much what my life consisted of while growing up. And right when I met Jacob I had just moved to the Roanoke, TX area and so my emotions were running high. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change the past for anything (well, maybe just one or two things, ha!) because it has made me the person that I am today. It prepared me for who I would be, and that is a Preacher's Wife.
Growing up in a preacher's family was definitely challenging, but it was rewarding as well. I lived in 6 different places which were: Quilan, TX, Niagara Falls, NY, Odessa, TX, Cleburne, TX, Purvis/Hattiesburg, MS, and Roanoke, TX. I went to 4 different schools, Odessa Christian School, Cleburne Community Christian School, Lamar Christian School, and Northwest High School, as well as tried to home school 2 different times. Every time we had to leave one of those places I thought the world was going to end, but then I would settle down, make new friends, and then cry all over again when we had to leave that place for the next. I like to think of myself as lucky because some people grow up in one place and never know anything different, and I have gotten to live all over the state (West, Central, and East Texas) as well as in 2 different states! I got to see God's beautiful creation not only in Texas but outside in our country as well. We had the opportunity to become close with different congregations of the Lord's Church and make best friends where ever we went. I now realize I grew as a person from each experience, and as hard as it may have been and as many times I wish we could have just settled down for good, I wouldn't want it any other way.
I never thought I would follow in my mother's footsteps and become a preacher's wife but God's will told me otherwise. And why chose a different path when being in a preacher's family is what I know? There are women out there who don't grow up the way I did and then become a preacher's wife. For me, I experienced it all and I know what to expect. I saw what my mother had to go through, the good and the bad, and that's what scared me a little. I didn't know if I could handle that. I am not a leader, I am shy (at first), I get nervous, I don't like being the center of attention. I don't feel I am ready to teach any Ladies Classes or Ladies Day. I still feel that I need to learn and grow and build up my confidence in myself. So how can I BE a good preacher's wife?
We are so blessed to have Atlanta Church of Christ as our first work because they have been beyond welcoming and understanding for the both of us. The elders hired Jacob without an official "try-out" (they heard him a few times before) and I said, "they are willing to hire you before they even know who your wife is? What if I was some crazy woman?" (Ha!) Jacob said, "they are hiring me as the preacher, not the preacher's wife." And that has kinda stuck with me since and helped ease my nerves. Some places do want a preacher's wife who will take control over things, especially with the ladies, etc. But I am very glad that (so far) this congregation hasn't expected that out of me or pressured me in any way. This way I hope I can take my time to grow and become comfortable enough before taking on bigger tasks. I am definitely one of their younger preacher's wives that they've had, so maybe they want to give me some growing room as well. Overall I have been very pleased with this congregation and their elder-ship, and I've enjoyed the times I have been able to get to know the ladies better. I feel like they see me as just a member of the Lord's church just as they are, which I am! And that has definitely allowed me to be able to come out of my shell more and challenge myself to go up to someone and speak to them first, to say hello. They have done a wonderful job of making us feel "at home" and a part of the family here, and we love every one! I am glad they realize that Jacob is the preacher and not me. ;)
An incident occurred recently that kinda hit home with me. Some ladies at the church were planning a party together. They were getting things together and organizing it themselves, but I realized they kept coming to me and asking my opinion on what I would do. After a bit I said to Jacob, "I don't know why they keep coming to me for everything it's their party..." And he said, "well it's because you are the preacher's wife." Those words have never hit me harder. It made me realize that no matter what age I am, no matter how shy I might be, that I am the preacher's wife. People will look to me as an example in things, want to hear my opinion/advice, watch how I raise my kids, etc. And even though this has been a smooth beginning for me as a preacher's wife, that I still have to live up to that title the best I can. Every preacher's wife is different, but I should be willing to do the things that I can for the church, and work on the things I am not ready to do. I now teach kids bible class, I helped organized 2 parties, I have had people over to our house and cooked (and that has been a big deal for me because I am not a "cook" as some of these women here are ha), and we have hosted care group meetings and devo's at our house. I might not be teaching a ladies class or doing devo's or organizing such things just yet, but I have done the best that I can and I hope every one can see that, but mostly I hope that God is proud of what I have tried to do here in Atlanta as "the preacher's wife".
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